Posted by: kathryngraves | March 18, 2012

Do You Trust Me?

Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. (NKJ)

The oncologist was actually excited after measuring my tumor, telling me it seemed much smaller. We set up an ultra-sound for the next visit to see how much. The idea I got from the doctor was to expect about a centimeter difference, maybe even more.

After the procedure, I asked the tech what she saw. She said it had shrunk some, and believing she spoke good news, she said, “About two tenths.”

I was shocked and devastated. And very afraid. She left to go tell the radiologist he could read the test while I sat alone in the room, perched on the edge of the table. As tears streamed down my face, the whole room filled with the voice of Jesus. You know how, when He speaks to you, it’s louder than out loud? That’s how it was for me that day.

He said, “Do you trust Me?”

In the silence that followed, I knew this was the moment I needed to make a conscious choice. Up until then, I’d just had so much going on, I hadn’t really focused on trusting. It had been more like clinging in the rush of calamity. Now things were slowing down and falling into a routine, but this wasn’t part of the routine. This was not how it was supposed to go. If the chemo wasn’t working, what did that mean?

Faced with almost the worst news of my life, Jesus asked me if I trusted Him. Given the scientific evidence to the contrary, could I, would I, trust Him?

It only took a second to decide. Of course I would. Jesus was the only One I could trust. As soon as I consciously made that choice, scriptures such as Romands 8:28 and Jeremiah 29:11 came into my mind. Jesus was already comforting me.

When we choose to trust Christ with our lives and our futures, He comforts us in the worst of times. He also gives us hope for the future. No matter how rough it is for a while, hang on, ’cause “Sunday’s coming!”

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Responses

  1. Beautiful! I was asked the same question by Him as my newborn was dying only twenty-two minutes after his birth…’Do you trust me?’ With a broken heart and knowing He had decided to take the little one back to Himself, I truthfully answered, ‘Yes. I trust You with Your child. He was never mine.’

    Again, beautiful post. Thanks for sharing!

    Carolyn (internetelias.wordpress.com)

    • Oh my! Thank you for sharing your story.


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